Okay, suggestive titles aside, there really is some truth here–just let me explain!  If you can’t stand the wait, she would be an “associate of vampires”, but that is  all you are getting from me.  You have to read for the rest.

As I was completing my walk today, I walked thru a park that has ball fields, a playground, a dog park, and lots of trees along the edges.  As I noted a “new” city vehicle at the park near the trail, I noticed its likely owner emerging from the foliage rolling a grocery cart type thing.  I was prepared to pass her without putting my deductive reasoning to the test.  Fortunately, I was willing to break my train of thought and begin the interview.

“Collecting this weeks mosquitoes?”, I asked after observing her cart with some netting and articles that seemed to be allowing people to check in but NOT check out.

She seemed to enjoy the interested and lit up.  And, then she went into a bit of an explanation.  “I drop the traps on Thursday and pick them up on Friday.  I don’t know what kind of mosquitoes I have in the basket.  I take them to the health department for them to determine that.  I do this from the end of March until about Thanksgiving.”

As you are now clearly aware, I was interviewing a vampire handler and NOT the vampire, but if we pretend she is a mosquito whisperer, I am not completely crazy for going down this pathway.

Knowing mosquitoes were being collected in a little white net “basket” within a 1/2 mile of my home, did cause the next few questions.  (I did ask in a conversational way, but a summary seems to make the whole thing more concise and readable.  She was not a quick talker…)

• Have they found any Zika? No
• What about West Nile?  Just last week they found some West Nile in a stagnant creek behind a trailer park.  It was a couple miles south of here.
• Do you get bit often?

The biting issue is where I was most intrigued by the conversation.  To my question, she answered, “Not to much, but I go through quite a bit of OFF. And, I often use the cheap baby oil/creme from the Dollar Store.”

Knowing there is something that is cheap AND smells better than garlic (trying to keep the vampire theme relevant), did get my attention.  I asked, “Do you always use them both OR do you believe the baby creme can work by itself?”

Although her answer took longer to sort out then I had the patience to recapture here, her boiled down reply was, “I have used them both separately and together.  Sometimes I forget one of the other.  Either one seems to work pretty well by itself.”

So, if you have a fear of mosquitoes and don’t like the smell of OFF or have any tastier humans nearby, consider spending a dollar at the Dollar Store and getting yourself some of this bane to vampire everywhere.  I “think” this is the anti-vampire product, but she didn’t have it to show to me.  It fits the price point she told me and the packaging description.  Good Luck!!

This is what the mosquito gathering apparatus looks like when collecting.