Christmas Letter (1992)

December, 1992

Dear friends and relatives:

Greetings to you and yours as we once again enter into the magical season of Christmas.  This year has been a year of change for the Gruenbaums, especially for Andy.  During the past year we have bought a house, Andy quit his job, went back to school (for a while), disrupted the flow of his resume, and is currently working 2 jobs (60+ hours per week).  Now that you know what is coming, you have a couple of choices:

  1. go and wrap some gifts and when you come back you can hope we have solved our own problems without dragging you into them; or
  2. you can brace yourself and read on, knowing our souls will be bared.

We are enjoying being homeowners.  We have done a few projects here and there, but our most enjoyable project was our garden.  We chose the appropriate part of our yard to carve out for our agricultural endeavor. After the preparing of the land for the indoctrination of the production organism, we planted the tomatoes, peppers, cabbage and zucchini.  Although we let our plants down by not watering as faithfully as we should have, the garden produced a nice supply of fresh veggies. Now that summer is over and winter is upon, our dining room is commonly known as the Gruenbaum greenhouse.  Andrew’s house plants are taking over.  Death has also visited the inner arboretum and is never taken gracefully.

Andy’s work history has suffered as of late.  After plotting his departure from Rose Products for quite awhile, he finally quit in April.  (We did take our vacation to Florida before he gave his two weeks notice.  Andy then became a student at Ohio State for two quarters taking mostly math and computer classes.  he was closed out of most of his classes this fall, and decided not to continue for now.  While searching for a job, he has been working, but it has been a sometimes half-hearted looking with the knowledge of a possible move. (Judy is looking for new employment opportunities, not necessarily in Columbus).  He is selling cellular phones again and working a customer service job 4 hours a night.  Thus, his resume does not flow smoothly.  We think 1993 will bring some stability to our lives.

We want to take this time to especially thank all of you for your continuing love and friendship throughout the year.  It is one of our greatest blessings.  To those of you from whom the miles separate us, we want you to know that we think of you often and pray for your well-being and happiness.  (To those of you who didn’t make it to this part of the letter, we hope you are glad you decided to do your Christmas preparations rather than read our letter.) May the peace and joy of God’s love be with you throughout this Christmas season and for the new year to come.

Sincerely yours,

Andy and Judy Gruenbaum

Where Are The Good Kindle Books?

I have had my Kindle for over 3 years.  I love my Kindle!!  (I say that even though my first Kindle was defective…rather the cover was.  The cover hooked into the Kindle in a particular way.  The hook was just a “little” too long.  Knowing that, explained why a slight bump at the wrong angle would reboot the Kindle.  I endured this off and on for over a year.  I missed the recall, but Amazon replaced everything and handled it perfectly.)  I have bought numerous books (mostly while at one day or short-term sales and while using Amazon Gift cards acquired from credit card points), picked up many books for free while trolling the Amazon-site or reviewing Kindle specific Facebook pages, received numerous free books every month as an Amazon Prime member, and finally, used my library account to get free books for a two week period.

Let us take for granted enough money and patience can allow you to eventually find a book to bring you reading pleasure.  Finding good free resources has been my recent problem!

Many of the free Amazon books are nearly unreadable.  (The exception are when an author permits a very popular book [usually the first book in a series to lure a reader in to the entire series] to be free with a plan of hooking the reader into a larger purchase additional items by the author)  Of the books I have read or tried to read, (I fancy books in the fantasy area OR the Christian area with dabblings in biographies, literature and history.  Business books are less than dabblings…better described as very occasional flirtations.), I have found it difficult to get past more than a couple of chapters. [Please note above exceptions]  The characters are flimsy; the reader is not engaged, and the lack of basic story telling skills seems to be VERY difficult to ignore.  Many of these books are written by individuals without an editor.  They are published without some professional feedback.  (Friends and loved ones have given feedback I am sure.  Unfortunately, they prefer to say “great” rather than hurt someones feelings.)  I am not saying the authors are failing.  As I see the covers of the “free” books, I have an expectation of the story the tome will tell.  Usually, the text of the book falls far short of the incredible journey painted by the cover.  (This has always been the case, but with access to so many free books where “fail” becomes the normal rather than the exception, the commitment to seek satisfaction within the “infinite” number of books available makes for a more demanding reader.  Why read a bad book, when you have access to so many other free books with possibly one you might like. Of the many books in the fantasy area, many seem to be urban fantasy and/or vampire books with strong elements of romance.  As a middle-aged man, those are not topics I am presently, or likely ever, seeking.)

Even with the “nearly” free Amazons books ($1.99), many of these books are also in the unreadable category. (After a recent quality reading drought, I read a book a called The Rithmastist .  It is well plotted and although written for a teenage audience, it reveals the story through a variety of methods-dialogue, observation etc. AND it was purchased while the price was reduced.) These books may be books offered to Amazon Prime members for free, but available at a cost to those who are not Amazon Prime members.  So, they are not free, but in most cases, they are not written by authors that have access to all of the tools available to a Dean Koontz or some other established writer.  There are some quality books in this mix, but it takes patience.

The greatest success has come from getting library books on my Kindle.  (Not a perfectly smooth process.  While the previous process allowed for checking out a book and returned prior to the 2 week checkout period, the process now demands you hold on to all checked out books for the full period.  If you get a book you don’t enjoy, there is no where to drive to return it.  You wait it out until the email comes letting your know your sentence has been nearly fully served.  “Would you like to renew?”)  To overcome logistic issues, I am able to checkout books on two separate cards.  I am able to reserve books I am pretty sure I want to read (the hold limit is 3 per library card).  And, I am able to check out up to 3 books on each card.  The problem is checking out a book (or 3 books) within a couple of days of each other.  If I completely read or don’t like the books checked out within the 2 week period, I am stuck until the two weeks expires. (This is where the second card has benefits.)

Due to the rather negative take on available options, I will try and propose solutions on my next post.  It is not impossible.  You just need a little patience!

The Pros and Cons of a Rental Car

Temporary Rental Car

Due to the little driving hiccup our van endured a couple of weeks ago (it was my hiccup and the van could be driven away.  My pride was only partially recovered when the rental car was returned.  I should, barring any further issues, be recovered by the end of the year.), we had to get a rental car.  Due to confusion from Safeco (they assigned us 2 adjusters.  I contacted the “wrong” adjuster and delayed the acquiring of the rental by a day or two.  Service King would not allow me to come in and drop the car off until Wednesday [I was calling on Monday].  I knew my “rep” was waiting on his wife to have a child, so I pushed it a bit and was able to get the van dropped off.  The van was routed to another Service King where construction was keeping them from getting many cars.  Supposedly, our van was placed on a flatbed for the trip to and from.), the damaged car was almost in my possession longer than my inflated ego could handle.  (My youngest son is supposed to get his license in February, and son #1 had a little accident in the past couple years that caused a bit of damage.)  Once I had the rental car, these are the pros and cons I discovered:

Pros

  • XM Radio:  I enjoyed finding the classic rock station (or one of the them…I believe it was Classic Rewind).  I could identify about 4 out of 5 songs they played on the station–the station hit my rocking age pretty well.  A few stray bands I wasn’t very familiar with AND too much Foreigner.
  • Built-in Movie:  The controls were a little tricky for this.  The whole front navigation screen had to move down to allow the DVD to be put in.  We lucked into the DVD sound once, and then the day it was returned I figured out how it actually worked.  The girls have put this feature on our next vehicle purchase.
  • Heated seats:  Not sure if I fully figured these out.  The heating controls (yes, there was a manual, but it was a rental – why should I read it?) involved multiple buttons.  And, if the buttons were hit once it was front and twice for the rear (or something like that).  Fortunately, it was “warm” most of the days we had the rental.  I figured the windows out without a problem!

Cons

  • Every time I drive it I am reminding that kissing other cars in public with your car has a cost.
  • Getting request from the back to change the channel or provide volume to the CD player can put me in a situation where the rental is susceptible to its own accident.  It is not just the kids requests.  I was playing around with Satellite stations.  As I switched between categories and played with features, I saw more than one “future” where I was going to have to explain how the rental arrived on the wrong side of a dotted line or straddling some other driving obstacle.
  • Our “real” van was certainly lonely.  Before we dropped it off, I had to clean out all of the umbrellas and misc. other things that we had let accumulate w/i its various crannies.  I am sure he was very sad to be away.  I remember, vaguely, having a dream of looking out through my headlights and having rain come over them–even while in a garage.  I am sure this was not any type of “connection” between me and the car.
  • The biggest con…..forgetting to grab the garage door opener when turning the rental car back in.  Recapping this story might bring up bad memories in all who are reading (or possibly in the teller).  So, I will just say, one word–visors!!  Beware the comfortably tucked away visor.

It is good to get things mixed up a little bit.  And, this adventure into rental land allowed for an occasionally interesting trip.  Hopefully, we can rent again before we are forced to do so again by a driving disaster…

Bored Daughter and Imagination

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My daughter sometimes has the need to be entertained.  When her best bud/sister is not around, she has to seek out people to help her get entertained.  Today, her father was volunteered to get injured.

I volunteered my hairy left arm.  Hairy arms seems to me be more challenging then smooth surfaces.  It took a bit of work.  (The process involves a tissue as the “wound”.  A mixture of Vaseline and red die was spread over the tissue.  Once the tissue was moistened with the Vaseline, the wound was formed.  Cocoa powder was sprinkled on the wound and worked in to darken the “blood”.)  She went after with great enthusiasm.  In fact, she enjoyed it so much, she went on to create an injury on her shin.

Getting Old (PG Version)

This is the year.  No, not just any year.  This is the year I hit the half century mark.  I don’t feel it.  Not having lived in anyone else s body before, it seems to feel about right.  I will try and note what is different than it was 30 years ago (or 20, but maybe not 5):

  • Bifocals:  Most days I almost don’t notice the switch I made to these special lenses.  Did I say “Bi-focals”?  I meant “Tri-focals”.  I don’t wear contacts; I only wear the lenses.  Most times the eyes feel like the eyes of a few decades ago.  A recent book I was reading on the kindle has VERY small print.  If reading in bed, I had to lean up and tilt my head back to get the right part of the lenses on the text.  “The” special lenses are a little humbling.  As aging goes, I don’t have any other optic concerns.
  • Bathroom visits:  Fortunately, I don’t have many sleeping problems.  (One will be noted shortly.)  Unless you count me enjoying a big glass of tea after 6:00.  If I do this, sleeping isn’t the problem, but sleeping the whole night is not likely to be unlikely.  Around 2:00 I wander into the bathroom.  If I am lucky, my brain never woke up.  If I am unlucky (and the more likely), my brain has a series of random thoughts fro 30 minutes or so.  (Random thoughts means there is brain activity–a good thing.  AND, something that has been taking place in this declining body for all of the nearly 5 decades I have been neglecting it.  Should I be doing daily brain exercises as I age or does bantering with the kids count?)
  • Spices:  It just doesn’t sit as easily as it used to sit.  If it is too spicy, all parts of my digestive tract are likely to voice their individual displeasure.  I sometimes think, “I shouldn’t was these peppers that come with our fajitas.”  A couple hours afterward, I realize wasting was the MUCH smarter choice.
  • Caffeine:  I used to be able to have a few cups of coffee in the morning.  The only downside was the taste quality deteriorated as I hit cup 3.  Recently, I have found having 2 cups of coffee puts me MUCH more on edge.  I am ready to leap through the phone with no explanation beyond being over-caffeine-stimulated.  So, if I consider doing 2 cups on any given day, I need to put an hour or more between them.  Sniff, Sniff.  At least, tea seems to treat an almost “old” person with more respect!
  • Ear plugs:  This has been a phenomenon of the past couple of years.  With very few exceptions (one of those absolute exhaustion), ear plugs keep me brain from being excessively active.  Not that I sleep in a bed with anyone who ever snores, but if I did, having something to mute the sound would certainly be a good thing.  The obvious answer is as I have aged my brain has become a more efficient machine that sees sleep as just a luxury for the young and mentally deficient.  Regardless, I prefer to indulge in regular sleep to try and keep this bag of bones operating long enough to allow time for the grey matter to work out its deep and world-changing thoughts.
  • Cracking joints:  They always cracked some
  • Vitamins:  Have taken them nearly all of my life.  Now, they have titles like “50 plus” or mention helping with “male menopause”  (or would it just be womenopause?).  They have things to combat joint issues, prostate issues, and all of the issues that I didn’t want to think about when I was much younger.
  • Ears:  I have not checked my ear lobes, but I have read they lengthen as we age.  My ears now need shaved/plucked quite frequently.  I am really not a fan of the part of the program.  However, it is nothing a quick glance in the mirror and a couple of strong fingers can’t fix.

Men’s Retreat 2014

I had the privilege this past weekend of attending the men’s conference at our church.  I am not much of a retreat/conference guy.  My history is a little patchy attending christian men’s events.

  • Retreats:  By definition, I guess retreats involve “overnight”.  As long as ear plugs are in my bag, this is typically not a problem.  (My own bed is better.  Better sleep typically equals a much better ability to really get into the retreat.)  Maybe it is the tiredness they play upon.  As people are more tired they can be more emotional.  The more emotional, the more effective a retreat.  Cynical?  Maybe.  I will give my testimony and witness to nearly anyone.  I am not embarrassed by my faith.  At retreats (and conferences but w/o the overnight so they have to go over the top a little higher), they introduce elements of drama to really pull at the heart strings.  (examples are having a cross at front and inviting attendees to “nail” their personal sins on the cross,  Or, the alter calls are done in such a way that you feel almost like you are without a heart if you refuse to go forward.)  I am not saying these methods are wrong.  I am not known for wearing my emotions on my sleeve.  And, even if I cry easier than I used to, I am not of the school (or I don’t have any skeletons presently in my closet) where theatrics lull me into a hypnotic state.
  • So MANY people:  At this weekends retreat, the weather was colder than expected.  The planners hoped the outdoors could play a more significant role as the men “hung” out.  It certainly would have helped me.  The first floor was SO crowded.  I got my food, snack or drink and headed to the second floor.  The crowds were nearly non-existent.  I could have a couple of conversations without feeling claustrophobic.  (I guess this means I don’t have agoraphobia)  If I knew more people, the crowds would not be as overwhelming.  Not knowing many, made it impossible to see the trees.  I only saw the forest and felt the fear of the unknown.  If I don’t engage in any conversations, then I don’t have to be reminded I know so few people at the church.  I admit it from the start.  Anything socially can then be a trickle rather than a fire hose.
  • So much standing:  I certainly see where standing can get the crowd more involved.  For a couple of songs, I can vote “yes” with my feet.  As the songs keep adding up, my varicose veins (not sure if actual or ingrained) say “sit”.  Usually, I do.  When standing (whine warning), I am usually not one of the clappers.  I seem to be able to do 2 of the 3: sing, stand or clap.  Rarely, do I neglect the singing.  Although I realize I am a victim of my past worship styles, the “singing” is a truly worshipful part of it.  Maybe if I did not take as much interest in the singing, I would be a bigger clapper or stander.  As long as God grants me a voice that can carry a tune, I will vote with my lips.
  • Speakers with their spin:  I believe God has gifted certain people to teach others.  One speaker may speak to the heart of a portion of the conference.  Likely, not everyone is going to “get” him in the same way.  For me, I put more emphasis on what a person was before they became who they are.  If I don’t know much of who they are, all of their philosophies on being a better father/son/christian/husband/servant are slightly hollow.  I would rather hear a guy tell me how he had a misspent youth before being saved.  When I hear his testimony, I can say, “I get him.”  If another speaker tells me all of the things he has done or I should do but gives me minimum insight into his faith journey, I question whether I want to follow in his steps.  The fruit is tastier if I know the type of tree it grows on….
  • Music:  As much as I may whine about some of the aspects of men’s conferences, the music (with the exception of the standing) is something I consistently enjoy.  I love to hear men sing (I say this assuming songs are picked within the right singing range).  Music with a “rock ‘n roll” beat and Christian lyrics is the best.  My youth was spent with this type of music, but less than desirable lyrics.  The choruses and the mix of styles (even some rap can be okay) gives many options for worship.  Although I cannot sing them all, I am content to listen to someone else sing/perform.  When singing my lips are sometimes on auto-pilot.  When listening, the spiritual truths of the song have time to penetrate my often thick, stubborn skull.

Should you go to a men’s conference?  (If not a male, the appropriate gender conference.) My kids have heard numerous times what is necessary to say they don’t like something–they must try it.  I did enjoy the music at the recent conference.  Certainly, I did glean something from some of the speakers.  My primary reason for going was to get my son there.  It was his first and he REALLY enjoyed it.  Would I go again?  I absolutely would if HE wanted to go again.  Otherwise, I am probably good for a couple of years.

Boys Liked The Book Thief

The weekends are for family time.  When you are a frugal family, you check to see if any good movies have graduated (or demoted, but for my dollar the “graduation” mean more buying power).  This past weekend, The Book Thief had made its move.  I felt certain the girls would enjoy the movie.  My concern was whether it would have enough action for the boys.  A different movie, 47 Ronin, started a few minutes later, so I thought we could all see a movie we enjoyed and the whole crew would be happy.

The girls started in about being tired or needing to sew or needing to rest or, what is most likely the case, just needing to be teenage girls without having to share a row in a movie theater with adults.  This, of course, complicated our decision.  Our 7th grader needed to do a project for school on the Holocaust. (The Hitler Youth…I think)  I felt confident the movie would provide some good background.  Since they won’t be our “girls” much longer, I still lobbied strongly (some may describe it as threatening to a point nearing duress).  Once our youngest son thought the thief might be fine for him too, I gave in and stopped applying pressure.  It was decided they would stay home and the rest of us would go.

When we got to the theater, I bought 4 tickets to the thief.  (Our oldest son thought he was still seeing the Ronin flick)  No popcorn, but the normal LOTS of previews of movies that did not seem to fit the standard profile of those who might enjoy the movie.  (One of my 7th grade daughters classmates was at the movie with his parents.  Obviously, he was not going to relax in his efforts to strive to be valedictorian.)  Not sure when TV shows started advertising during the previews, but I don’t really care for it.  I believe my family (and many of the families there) did not care about a family of millionaires showing how bad their behavior was every week.  For me, it was a reminder of one network I don’t want to watch.

Both Judy and I enjoyed the movie.  And, the boys both seemed to enjoy it as well.  So much loss and so much suffering.  Likely, not as many deaths as in the Ronin movie, but definitely quite a few.  Whether it was the deaths or the softening of the teenage-nearing-adult hearts as they witnessed the suffering of individuals rather than “warriors”, the boys/men enjoyed the movie as well.

I cannot say for sure, but I am guessing they are more mature than I was at their age.  And, if this is so, then they probably have a chance in surpassing me emotionally AND every other way….

Knuckle Injuries

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Trying to be a good husband last weekend, I committing to moving some plants and planting some new plants in the flower bed.  While executing the plan, I neglected to plan for the injuries that so often accompany these landscaping moments.

The knuckle on the middle finger was created while using a pick to try and take out a very large root from our now non-existent magnolia tree.  While lifting up the pick handle, my finger, although wearing a glove, became wedged between the handle and a barely visible sprinkler head.  The other injury (on the top knuckle of the pointer finger on the same hand) was caused when I grabbed a tool out of the tool rack.  This finger was slit by a sharp edge of one of the other tools.  The “how” of the injuries is not really important.  It is the challenge of living with injured knuckles until they heal that is the real point.

These are the things injured knuckles have made more difficult:

  • Tucking in clothes:  Most people don’t tuck anymore, but I still do. So, it can be a knuckle-bumping opportunity.
  • Hand washing:  The washing is not ALL bad.  The soap may burn a little.  It is the drying that is the worst.  The knuckles tend to get a little abuse during the drying process.  And, being a little nutty about germs, does cause frequent washings.
  • Flossing:  My flossing technique has me wrapping the string around my top knuckles of both pointer fingers.  While doing the “flossing” thing, the injury does get irritated.  I am a big boy and can handle it.  Finger injuries are just not forgotten while they heal.
  • Tying shoes:  Again, fingers can be swapped while the knots are being made.  Until the knuckles are healed, I am reminded many times during the day that my fingers are VERY valuable.
  • Digging into front pockets:  I have to be careful here so I don’t dig into my pocket with the knuckles unprotected.  If I dig in with the knuckles “tucked in”, they don’t rub against the inside of the pocket.  If I don’t tuck, the scab is scraped off leaving a trickle of blood coming from the re-injured area.
  • Going outside when it is cold and your knuckles dry out:  This happened just this morning.  Even with gloves on, my knuckles bled.  They were so dry a small amount of blood trailed off in the knuckle wrinkles.
  • Buckling seatbelts:  It will hurt more depending on which hand the knuckle injury is on.  In my case, OWWWWWWW!!!!

Do I mean to whine?  I am trying to do a sub-par Andy Rooney impression?  No, I am just doing a brain dump and capturing a few thoughts.  I appreciate you reading.  I will try to do better next time!

Leftover Breakfast

The satisfaction of cleaning out the cupboard

The satisfaction of cleaning out the cupboard

The kids know I am VERY big on getting rid of leftovers.  This is normally a topic that comes up around dinner time.  (If it is around the holidays, mom may have made a breakfast casserole that would also fall into the “leftover” category.)  In fact, I often announce the night before  tomorrows dinner will be leftovers.  (This is sometimes determined by the number of plastic containers full of food in the fridges [there is a preferred leftover fridge and shelf in the fridge] or by the kids schedule and my ability or inability to prepare something of value.)  During the summer time, I will often offer bribes of Yogurtville or picnics to entice the pool-dwellers to stretch a little extra as they make their dining choices.  (Are you sure you want that?  If you take a couple scoops of this we can finish it up entirely.  Or, similar things a coach might say to his athletes to try and squeeze the maximum performance out of them or their appetites.)

No such excitement occurred today.  (However, last night it was announced it would be warmups for supper because their was a High School away soccer game.)  Due to the girls needing to get to school early (Rachel is on the scholarship team and had to go over her math problems), I needed to pull together breakfast quickly.  And, cold cereal is often the choice of quick breakfast choosers.  (I am not a fan of pop tarts.  If I was, they would win both the quick and transportable award.)

My viewing of the cereal cupboard convinced me it would not be a normal breakfast.  I knew 2 of the 3 open boxes were in the orphan category.  (Where there is so little left and what is left is mostly crumbs or in the case of frosted flakes, it is was sugar.)  After dumping a half cup or less of the raisin bran and frosted flakes, my bowl still looked very lonely and lean.  My daughter volunteered the box of Lucky Charms.  Not being particular partial to Lucky Charms (likely some residual belief from child hood.  My mother could easily have told me once that marshmallows in your cereal gives you acne or some such thing.  Whatever the story, I have not eaten marshmallows for breakfast in decades.)  The addition of the Lucky Charms seemed to make the bowl “about right”.  Once the milk was added and the “floating rules” were all applied, it looked like I was eating Lucky Charms with occasional variety in flavors.

Would I do it again?  Oh, sure.  I could choose it, but if it chooses me (or my OCD that demands the consumption of leftovers demands to be heard) I would fill the bowl.  My spoon and I would enjoy another adventure.

 

Proactive Coke Rewards

Today’s outing (No, I didn’t drink all of these.  It is recycle day, and I was going through everyones bins to collect the points.  I do have some pride–I won’t dig too deep or dig down too many layers if the bins are stacked) consisted of 4 large cases, 10 small cases, & 9 lids.  It almost cost me a set of keys (they fell out of my jacket pocket while I was scrounging).

What are Coke Rewards worth?  Besides my wife’s undying gratitude, they buy her free Shutterfly albums. With the nearly 200 points accumulated today, a large dent was put in the next album.

Happy wife – happy life!