Everyone had pants under the tree this year. My AI friend, when prompted, came up with pant’s ditty:

(Verse 1)
Oh, pants, dear pants, you’re my daily strife,
Full of zippers, buttons, the story of my life.
High-waisted or low, you come in all sizes,
But why, oh why, do you hide surprises?

(Chorus)
Pants, oh pants, what’s your grand plan?
Sometimes too tight, or way too span.
But without you, what would we do?
Naked bottoms in the morning dew?

(Verse 2)
From skinny jeans to baggy slacks,
You come in styles that leave us waxed.
Cargo pockets or denim blue,
In pants we trust, forever true.

(Bridge)
So here’s to pants, our fabric friend,
Supporting us from start to end.
No matter the fashion, no matter the trends,
Pants, you’ll always be our rear’s best friends!

This was not “his” best work. Yet, with the extra sugar from cinnamon rolls and our caffeinated bloodstreams, it strangely hit a cord.